The One Where Shea looks within...
I honestly think the reason people give up, the reason they want to walk away is because they forget their value. They think that if they are no longer there, nothing will change, it will go unnoticed. They don’t understand the heartache and hurt that can be caused by the lack of their absence. I think sometimes we get so caught up in our own feelings, our sadness that we don’t understand or see what it does to those that we care about. What if I told you that those negative thoughts are lies and that they are keeping you from being your best self! What if I were to tell you, like a rainbow needs all it’s color to shine, this world, your loved ones need you so they can shine too. We undermine our value, but those that love us find us invaluable. I know some days it feels like giving up is the answer, that walking away from everything seems to be the easiest route, but what if I told you what you think may be easy, may in fact be one of the hardest things you could ever do.
The last couple of weeks I thought about quitting the gym, I was putting so much stress on myself thinking it needed to be this "perfect picture" of losing weight, getting thin and then honestly, I didn't know what. I was so frustrated that I was in the exact same spot that I was one year ago, that the answer in my head was to just give up. I had some crucial talks with some very important people and I decided that quitting wasn't the answer and the more that I thought about it, the reason that I go to the gym isn't to become "The Fittest Human on Earth" or to get what I perceive as the "Perfect Body"...I go to the gym for the feel good moments, the challenging moments, the holy sh*t that was hard moments, the hugs, the tears, the firsts, the yes's, the are you kidding me moments and the moments that take your breath away both actually and figuratively. The loss of weight, the gains in strengths are really just an added bonus. I think that it was wrong of me to ever think it was a good idea to walk away from something so important and think that it wasn't going to affect me and those I care about.
I share my stories, my thoughts because I know there is someone out there just like me. Thinking their absence isn't noticed, that their actions aren't felt and that they don't leave an impact wherever they go. Truth be told, I think there are more like me, than aren't. A couple of things I want you to take away! Don't EVER quit! Talk to one or many! And if you think the gym is just a place to lose weight and lift the heaviest, you my friend are at the wrong place. A gym should give you all the feels a family does, that includes frustration because without the easy, the hard and everything in between; we would never become all we were meant to be.
Thank you from the bottom of my big heart for those that always restore the color in my world and not only remind me of my value, but love me when I don't feel very loveable. This is probably the rawest blog I have ever written, but someone, somewhere is thinking about giving up (whatever that may mean to them) and I want them to read this and remember that they too put color in this world, even if today they don't feel as sparkly as yesterday!
"You are valuable because you exist. Not because of what you do or what you have done, but simply because you are"-Max Lucado
Nothing Butta love for you all!